Do I stay or do I go...

Right now I stand on the fence unsure of what to do.  My flight is scheduled to depart at 4pm tomorrow to take Caleb and me back to Kansas City, Missouri, to my husband Sam and 3 year old Kael and our broken Joplin.  But, I could stay here in Washington another week and ride out the storms.  My heart strings are pulling me back there, but instincts say wait.

It is so hard to know what to do when you are so conflicted.  This trip was such a wonderful break with family, friends, dinners, coffees, shopping…and then eeeeerch!  Forward motion halted when I got the call from Sam.  His voice so calm, what else would I expect he is not usually bothered by much; “Honey, we are in a tornado.  There are debris in the yard and a boat in the tree.  But we are ok.”  My response, “ok, love you.”  His, “Ok, talk to you soon.”  Then I flipped open my computer and started to realize what actually was taking place back in Joplin, where so many people I love were facing “up the hinny of a tornado” as Pastor Bryan, our youth pastor, tenderly put it.

I think about Kael and that if the tornado had hit on Saturday he would have been here…

Here is Kael just the day before, when things were peaceful and the destruction that you see in the above picture was this beautiful grass.

And Sam would have been at the dealership, which is now destroyed.

I praise God that by his grace our nanny Missy, her husband and their children are ok.  They have no home, but they have each other and their unwavering faith in God. The picture you see above was their apartment.  They lived on the second floor which is no longer there at all.  They praise Him through this crisis.  They are in a motel now, plans unsure, but they are alive.  Sam told me that he talked to Sebastian, Missy’s husband, and they huddled in their neighbor’s first story apartment, lying on top of the children, while they were pounded by debris.  After the tornado passed, Sebastian pulled five people out of the rubble.  I read on Sebastians facebook page that a neighbor searched desperately for his son who had text that he was buried, but they haven't been able to find him.

Colby, Sam, and Kael huddled in the closet in the center of our house.  Luckily we were blessed that all we got was debris.  But it is debris from our neighbors’ homes, and from our city.  I just watched the news and saw the aerial footage.  The devastation is astounding.  I am so grateful that it was Sam there and not me; if Sam had been here in Seattle and me there in Joplin the conversation would have been very different and probably would have included a lot of LOUD words.

Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers.  Pray for Missy, Sebastian and their four children, and all the people in Joplin whose lives are changed forever.

Xoxo

Ronda